Judge to Child: Do you want to live with your mother?
Child: She beats me.
Judge: Okay, so you want to live with dad?
Judge: Why not?
Child: He beats me too.
Judge: So who do you want to live with?
Child: England Team
Child: They never beat anyone!
What?s the difference between the England team and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
In a statement from broadcasting house, all future England games will now be shown on the gay porn channel. It is thought that 11 assholes being regularly shafted is too explicit for regular TV.
It has been announced that next years shirt sponsor for England will be Tampax.
A spokesman said, " To sponsor a load of cunts going through a bad period is exactly what our company is all about."